Don't Believe In Make-Believe

As children, one of the first things we are introduced to is fairy tales. We are presented with a world of make-believe and told about stories that never happened, about people who never existed and about magic that disobeys all of nature’s laws. As we grow up, we realize that there’s no Santa Claus climbing down the chimney on Christmas Eve, there’s no such thing as talking animals (except parrots), and Cinderella’s story is just another girl’s dream (which in most cases doesn’t come true). My biggest question is WHY?

If I put myself in any parent’s shoes, I begin to understand that all they want to do is protect us from the infinitely cruel reality. They want us to believe that everything is striking, perfect and even if it’s not- the ending always becomes a “happily ever after”. We are taught to be exceptionally hopeful in life, live fearlessly and gain many other moral values that seem to come along with every one of those enchanting stories. That’s all great, but the truth is- we are taught lessons in the most sugar-coated way possible, and the only things we remember at the end of these lessons is that to be the princess, you have to be breathtakingly beautiful  (and by that I mean the prettiest thing alive), that your prince will come and get you no matter what (even if it means he has to kill someone) and that you’re always going to have some superpowers or magical friend that will help rescue you from all the bad guys. I’m pretty sure that's not the direction you were headed in, was it?

I have nothing against the charm and positive aura that these stories create around children, but I have an objection from the fact that parents DO hurt children by telling them years later that these things were….a lie. I have an objection against the pounds of expectations that are built up in our minds that we just can’t let go of. For all I know, I’d never even want to know about Santa, I’d rather just be thankful that my mom and dad spent their entire holiday bonus getting me the most incredible Christmas gifts. According to me, knowing this reality would actually make me love them even more (as a child).

It’s not that I don’t know that these are traditions that have been carried down the line since decades. But why do you need your children to hang on to something that doesn’t even exist, and then expect them to remember the lesson, but forgive the whole story behind this lesson for being surreal? I believe that the second a child knows the truth- he will forget what you had been trying to teach him all along. There are families who don’t follow these traditions, and their children turn out just fine. The children still grow up to be loving and caring, and even though they don’t believe in magic, it’s not something they can’t live without.

My thoughts might seem disrespectful or bold to some people, but all I’m trying to say is, there are better ways for parents to teach their kids to become better humans. It’s not fair to tell them about something that you don’t believe in yourself. Of course mystical things like witches and wizards are great in the movies (and books), but if you let your children see them just like a movie or a book, they’ll definitely turn out more practical as they grow up. They won’t be so heartbroken and they’ll still admire the characters just as much. To add to it, they might even cherish these stories more, now that they don’t have to be told to come back to reality.

As a child, I always felt that life around me was perfect, because my parents chose to omit the things that were too hard for me to handle as a child. But I was never really made to believe in these fictions. So things like having a rip-off dress or a perfect appearance never really mattered to me. My parents taught me to be a better person by displaying those qualities in themself. Whether it meant to learn to give up half the candy on Halloween because it would hurt my teeth, or share my toys with the other kids who came home on parties- I learned to do it (even if I cried my eyes red sometimes). They managed to protect without hurting me more than necessary, and today, I know everything about life the way it is, and I'm actually happier this way. And I think I’ll go the same way, when it’s my turn to be a parent. J